Laissez Faire

Letting Life Lead

Yeah Write #48: Cold ( #flashfiction )

Surf's Up

The sky is scarlet
blinding on white ice
casting shadows on the sparrow.

Feathers plume on the sparrow.
The holly, with berries scarlet,
shimmers under ice.

Warmth compels the ice
to drip upon the sparrow,
and the sun beams scarlet.



8 comments on “Yeah Write #48: Cold ( #flashfiction )

  1. WovenEclipse
    December 14, 2016

    Gorgeous poem! The imagery is beautiful 🙂


  2. Donna-Louise Bishop
    December 15, 2016

    I loved the imagery of the first stanza, especially. Thanks for sharing 🙂


  3. Christine
    December 15, 2016

    Lovely job! It feels almost like three interconnected haikus. I know the tritina form is new to you, so I thought I’d mention that there ought to be a single, concluding line that includes the three words in order 1, 2, 3. If you want to learn more, check out Rowan’s tritina tutorial:


    • Laissez Faire
      December 15, 2016

      Dang, I totally missed that in my haste. I’ll add one more line when voting is done to finish it. Thanks for the heads up.


  4. Anonymous
    December 15, 2016

    Lovely imagery!


  5. saroful
    December 16, 2016

    Keeping the length of your lines similar really helps the reader focus on the transition of imagery in the poem, from cold to warm – the whole thing reads like three drops of water falling from an icicle.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


This entry was posted on December 14, 2016 by in poems, writing, Yeah Write and tagged , , , , , , , .

Email Subscribe and Support

Subscribe to Tara Writes at Become a Patron
pinterest-button Follow LaissezFaireLife on Twitter google feedburner
Follow Laissez Faire on

Get blog updates by Worpdress via email, or choose Mailchimp.

Join 1,548 other subscribers

Shop With Me!

My Reviews

Shop and Read My Reviews

Aspiring writer, wife, mother of two, owner two cats. Teacher, lover of science, books, science fiction, fantasy, and video games.


Visit My Fellowship

Corey Hastings

writing, traveling, and tap dancing around town.

Write Josephine Write

Leave your fear of the dark at the door, suspend your disbelief and come on in...

Kim Witbeck

Writer and procrastinator

Jina S. Bazzar

authors inspirations

The Mad Puppeteer

Warden of Words // Shaper of Stories

Gawky Scribbler

Bewitching Journey of Words to Meaning

Building The Love Shack

This is the story of building a cottage , the people and the place. Its a reminder of hope and love.

Learning to write

Just your average PhD student using the internet to enhance their CV


Pen to paper

%d bloggers like this: